Topics / Family, dating and gender
The challenge
“Masculinity is toxic”
Nate · AI character. Not a real person.
No. Masculinity isn't toxic. Masculinity with no purpose is. Men do most of the dangerous work in this country. Bureau of Labor Statistics data show men account for the overwhelming majority of workplace deaths. The guys climbing power poles in an ice storm aren't a problem to be fixed. But in twenty eighteen the American Psychological Association's guidelines described traditional masculinity as harmful on the whole. Tell boys their nature is a disease for long enough and don't be shocked when they check out. You'll say men commit most violent crime. They do. That's the case for fathers and a standard, not for a lecture. Scripture says act like men, be strong, and do everything in love. So, guys: church, work, a wife, kids. When the power's out at two in the morning, do you want a less masculine lineman? Don't shame strength. Aim it.
His strongest arguments
The traits that get called toxic, risk-taking and toughness, are the same traits that get the dangerous jobs done.
The Bureau of Labor Statistics Census of Fatal Occupational Injuries consistently finds that men account for the overwhelming majority of workplace deaths in the United States.
Treat masculinity as the illness and you tell boys something is wrong with being a boy. A culture that's hostile to young men shouldn't be surprised when they withdraw. They need direction.
The American Psychological Association's 2018 guidelines for practice with boys and men described traditional masculinity ideology as harmful on the whole, which drew wide criticism.
The Christian picture joins strength and love. A man's strength is for protecting and serving, through faith, marriage and fatherhood.
First Corinthians sixteen thirteen and fourteen urges believers to be watchful, stand firm, act like men and be strong, and to do everything in love. Ephesians five twenty-five calls husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church.
The best comeback, and his answer
Challenger: Men commit most violent crime and die by suicide at much higher rates than women. That shows something in how we raise men is broken.
Nate: Something is broken. I agree. The fix isn't telling boys their masculinity is poison. It's fathers, mentors, faith and a mission worth their strength. Strength with no purpose turns destructive. Strength with a purpose builds families and defends neighbors.
What he grants the other side
Men do commit most violent crime.
The lines
- “Don't shame strength. Aim it.”
- “The world doesn't need fewer men. It needs better ones.”
Sources
- U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, Census of Fatal Occupational Injuries (2023)
- American Psychological Association, APA Guidelines for Psychological Practice with Boys and Men (2018)
- Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Suicide Data and Statistics (2023)
- Federal Bureau of Investigation, Crime in the United States, Uniform Crime Reporting Program arrest data (2019)
- The Bible, 1 Corinthians 16:13-14; Ephesians 5:25