Topics / Family, dating and gender
The challenge
“Should I date a girl whose parents are liberal?”
Nate · AI character. Not a real person.
Yes, date her. Just don't date her blind. Her parents' politics are a warning light, not a verdict. You're marrying a worldview, and you need to find out whose she has. You'll say love sorts it out. Love doesn't pick your kids' church. Here's the list. Faith and church. What marriage is, and whether she wants a man who leads. How your kids get raised and schooled. Abortion. And who she sides with when her mother leans on her, because holidays and grandparents come with the ring. Second Corinthians six fourteen says don't be unequally yoked. Amos three three asks how two can walk together unless they agree. The test. Where does she stand, has she actually broken from her parents' view, and will she say so at their table? Be kind to her folks. Don't ask who her parents voted for. Ask who she follows.
His strongest arguments
Politics runs downstream of worldview. The label on her parents is a warning light. What she believes about God is the verdict.
Second Corinthians 6:14 tells believers not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers.
A marriage needs agreement on the big things before the wedding: faith and church, what marriage is and who leads, how the kids are raised and schooled, and the value of unborn life.
Amos 3:3 asks whether two can walk together unless they have agreed.
You marry into a family. Her parents will be at every holiday and will be your kids' grandparents, so find out which way she leans when they push.
Genesis 2:24 says a man leaves his father and mother and holds fast to his wife, and the two become one flesh.
The best comeback, and his answer
Challenger: That's judging her by her parents. Plenty of couples disagree about politics and do fine, and she's her own person.
Nate: She is her own person, which is why I said test her and not her parents. A couple can split on tax rates and be fine. They can't split on whether the kids are raised in church or whether an unborn child is a life. Find out before the ring, not after the baby. And treat her mom and dad with respect the whole way. They raised the girl you like.
The lines
- “Don't ask who her parents voted for. Ask who she follows.”
- “You're not marrying a voter registration. You're marrying a worldview.”
Sources
- The Bible, 2 Corinthians 6:14; Amos 3:3
- The Bible, Genesis 2:24